I am totally enraged over this:

My friend who happens to be gay is getting married next weekend, and he asked me about what's involved in change his last name to his husband-to-be's. I wasn't sure, so I asked a co-worker about changing your last name once your married. Conversation then goes as follows:

Me: So D, how do you change your last name, for example, after getting married?
D: Why? Oh, is this for your friends who are getting married? The gay ones?
Me: Yeah....
D: Why would they bother getting their name changed? Does our state even recognize it?
Me: They recognize it as a civil union, but they give the same benefits as if it were a marriage.
D: Well I still don't see the point in them doing it.
Me: Why not? I think it's really cute. They're even doing the whole thing of not seeing each other for 24 hours by staying at their parent's house... (BIG mistake. This opens a can of worms.)
D: Scowls. Are they going to throw the bouquet and do the garter thing too?
Me: Well that wasn't inappropriate at all. How very discriminatory of you.
D: How so?

I wanted to punch her.

It's not just her either. My mom has been guilty of it, by asking "So who's the girl and who's the guy?"
"Mom they're both guys."
"But someone has to be the girl."

But with her I think it's because it's a completely different generation, and I don't think she means any harm by it. She just doesn't grasp the concept of it well. She loves my gay friends.

It's hard to tell sometimes when people ask questions about my gay friends whether it's harmful and being mean, or they really just don't understand.